Real Housewives of Orange County
I know I shouldn't, but I can't help myself - like staring at a trainwreck, or watching farm animals fucking - I know I should look away, but I just can't break my gaze. And the whole nightmare is worth it just for the superhot Shane Keough. Vicki Gunvalson is actually admirable. She works full-time while her unemployed hubby rehabs houses. She's a control freak, but a good egg. Jeana Keough is a real peach - a former playmate with mesmerizing eyes and 3 gorgeous kids (see Shane below, wuf!). Lauri Waring is my other favorite - fallen from wealth and power - now living in a small townhouse and working for Vicki to support her family. Lauri is a rockstar (and a "MILF"). Kim 'Shrimp-Tits' Bryant, (Kimberly Bryant) self-proclaimed "trophy wife" is a hideous wreck - a leather skeleton with 27 pounds of breast implants hanging from her rib cage, and horrifying frizzed hair extensions. 
But she's been diagnosed with cancer so I'll be nice. Finally, Jo De La Rosa - whore to the uber-sleazy Slade Smiley (megalomaniac and king of conspicuous consumption) is a Jerry Springer white-trash wannabe. Her slimy, needle- dicked sugar pimp, Slade, mentions "dusting with Pledge" to which the dumb cunt Jo responds "what's Pledge?" (while golfing slade says: "we're rich, we don't have to be good") Jo is a useless waste of make up and tampons. Get a life Jo, you're disgraceful. Vicki, I respect you. Jeana, I really like you. Kim, God help you. Shane, I want to fuck you. Jo, expatriate quietly. Lauri, I truly admire you... you're one of the realest deals amidst a bogus bunch of botoxed bourgeois bimbos.
posted by Aethlos at 11:45 AM
15 Comments:
I'm sorry but I think I'm missing all of this. What and who the heck are they?
I dont watch TV - but you just made me want to
PS and no offense to your wife or significant other - BUT YOUR FREAKIN CUTE
No significant other here baby!... wanna procreate? :)
"YOUR FREAKIN CUTE!"
That said... *cough* *snicker* :)
Poor Shane. I caught the episode where Mom still didn't throw a graduation party for him, even though he said he didn't want one. Come on, Mom! That's what Moms do! They throw you parties when you don't want them!
Instead, he spent the time alone laying mostly naked in the pool. Very Dustin Hoffman of him. But I felt so bad for him. I truly did. And then I rewound the scene and felt bad for him some more, laying there mostly naked in the pool. And then I got a Kleenex to clean myself up, didn't feel as bad anymore and changed the channel to watch Battlestar Galactica instead.
And then I saw Jamie Bamber being mostly naked in a locker room scene and...
(joking... sorta...)
OMG, paloch - so true. i can't even count how many times shane has inspired me to reach for the kleenex eeeeewwww. HOT.
well, well, well. And i thought you were above human nature :)
Above human nature? OMG, no no no. Baby, i AM human nature. I am as horribly perfectly hideously wonderfully human as human can be... Yikes.
You don't look away from farm animals?
I fucking videotape it. And add commentary.
See why we're friends?
I will overlook the fact that you have not checked out my Lily digs at Blue Republic. This moshpit librarian SO needed a place to kick it.
I'm glad I resisted the temptation to watch this show. I would be addicted. I love train wrecks, and I knew this would be one big one.
I would be remiss not to mention that just I got a very nice email from Jeana - so she's my new favorite. Jeana you're an angel with gorgeous eyes, and thank you for sharing your life - I admire you. Remember what I said about your league. xoxox
You know why this show is addicting? Becuase there is no way of escaping it. Daytime television sucks and if you turn to bravo any day anytime you are either going to get THE REAL HOUSEWIVES or BLOW OUT. So day after day, with nothing to watch, you end up at the same channel starring at overly estroginated (is that a word?) upper middle class housewives who really have nothing better to do than follow the exact sterotype of what it means to be a housewife in the OC, or you can end up watching a man who is more in love with hair than life itself... I actually think that this show was intended to put the gay community in a trance... I know i sit and stare and think to myself.... "one day that will be me in the french maids outfit dusting my mans solid oak banister." mmmmmmmmm...
Carl's right about this show being mind-numbing. I first decided to watch it to ascertain its sociological value. What can it teach me about modern West Coast life in America? (I'm from the upper midwest)
There is no real answer. These women raise their children with as much uncertainty and second-guessing and indecisiveness as I see all over the country.
Far too much money and independence (in the wrong ways) and not enough responsibility and accountability.
The men are a mixed bunch but I wouldn't let that Slade anywhere near children. I can't believe he brings his live-in girlfriend Jo into their lives when she is obviously NOT "mother" material.
And then he complains when she acts out like a normal, semi-mature twenty-something because she isn't what he wants her to be. "Step up" he says about Jo? Wake up, Slade and go find a woman your own age with the same goals for her domestic life. It will take YEARS, maybe decades for Jo to get there.
man check this loser out
http://www.myspace.com/sladesmiley
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